There are a few pitfalls I have noticed that keep many young physicians from designing the fulfilling lives they desire after their professional training is over. Part of the problem is a dysfunctional mindset developed during the years of medical school and graduate medical education. In order to be better at caring for ourselves as well as we care for others, we physicians have to acknowledge the residual negative effects from our years in the medical education pipeline.
It is my firm belief that awareness is the essential first step toward taking the appropriate actions to support consistent well-being, satisfaction and success. This is my third piece in a series to help early career physicians recognize how you may be unwittingly contributing to your own dissatisfaction. Hopefully, accepting these uncomfortable truths will allow you to acknowledge your power to go from surviving to thriving
External Validation
One has to be in school for quite a long time to become a physician. Part of what keeps you going is a belief there will be a certain amount of external validation to supplement the sense of personal satisfaction that comes from helping others. Unfortunately, that validation doesn’t always show up as expected when you enter the workforce. That’s when you are left to figure out for yourself what is important to you and for you.
One reality of the medical education path is that you are constantly in pageant mode. You make sure you have the proper grades, extracurricular activities, and MCAT scores to warrant an interview to medical school. You do your best to stand out to the instructors and attending physicians in medical school who will write the most glowing recommendations for residency. You do research and write papers on topics most likely to be chosen for publications that will impress fellowship programs.
Once your resume has caught their attention, you put on your most professional attire and travel around the country in the hopes that someone with decision-making power will deem you worthy of being a member of their community. This is simply part of the process of becoming a medical doctor. My concern is that once physicians get out into real world positions, you often are still in that “pick me” mindset.
The whole point of those years obtaining the best opportunities for education and training is to gain desirable skills that employers are seeking. This is not an endorsement of hubris and unrealistic demands. It is an exhortation to appreciate what you have to offer as well as what they do. Assuming you are actually a competent physician, no one is doing you a favor by offering you a job!
That being the case, know what you want from a work situation before you interview. Understand that your priorities don’t necessarily have to be important to an employer to make them valid for you. You do have to know what makes them significant for you so you can articulate and negotiate for them.
Recognize that if something is important to you and a no-go for an organization, this may not be the right fit for you. This realization may occur during the interview process or after years on the job. Everything is not for everybody. Some things are only meant for you for a season. Getting caught up in external validation without tapping in to your own internal guidance gets you stuck where you are not meant to be. We overachievers tend to grind harder hoping to get approval that is never coming instead of recognizing the need to move on.
The beauty of being an attending physician is you have more power than you have ever had to make choices for your life. This is why it is crucial to have a proper sense of how to internally validate your decisions. That way you are more likely to choose what is actually right for you and not just what looks right from the outside.
I invite you to consider how you make decisions about your personal and professional life. Whose opinion means most to you? How is that mindset serving your overall well-being and success?
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Dr Jattu Senesie is a board-certified obstetrician-gynecologist, certified success coach, physician satisfaction specialist and speaker. She blogs about issues of self care and well-being in an effort to help her fellow altruistic high achievers find satisfaction in their success as early in their careers as possible.
